Life in the Slow Lane

January 15, 2009

Buffalo’s absence from NBC hockey schedule baffling

Filed under: Television — pauljlane @ 5:40 pm

Color me befuddled that NBC’s flex schedule for its NHL game of the week does not feature Buffalo at all this season.

The network will draw one game per week from a pool of a handful of games to televise at 12:30 p.m. Sundays. Hockey “hotbeds” such as Nashville, Florida and Atlanta appear on the list, but not Buffalo, a city always in the top five hockey-watching U.S. markets (Canadian teams aren’t scheduled since NBC can’t draw ratings points from the Great White North.

How does this happen? Buffalo isn’t having a great season, but you at least KNOW that people will watch. What, will 15 Coyotes watch when Phoenix appears on The Peacock? Some has some ‘splainin to do.

Here, from NBC is the season schedule.

(All Games Announced At Least 13 Days Prior)

Sunday, Jan. 18, 12:30 p.m. ET
New York Rangers @ Pittsburgh

Sunday, Feb. 8, 12:30 p.m. ET
Detroit @ Pittsburgh
Philadelphia @ Atlanta
Nashville @ Dallas

Sunday, Feb. 15, 12:30 p.m. ET
Colorado @ Detroit
Philadelphia @ New York Rangers
San Jose @ New Jersey

Sunday, Feb. 22, 12:30 p.m. ET
Pittsburgh @ Washington
Colorado @ Carolina

Sunday, March 8, 12:30 p.m. ET
Boston @ New York Rangers
Pittsburgh @ Washington
Phoenix @ New York Islanders
Colorado @ Chicago

Sunday, March 15, 12:30 p.m. ET
Philadelphia @ New York Rangers
Detroit @ Columbus
Boston @ Pittsburgh

Sunday, March 22, 12:30 p.m. ET
Philadelphia @ Pittsburgh
New Jersey @ Boston
Los Angeles @ Chicago

Sunday, April 5, 12:30 p.m. ET
Minnesota @ Detroit
Pittsburgh @ Florida
Atlanta @ Washington

Sunday, April 12, 2:00 p.m. ET
New York Rangers @ Philadelphia
Detroit @ Chicago
Boston @ New York Islanders
St. Louis @ Columbus


Feature films and KFC, together at last

Filed under: Entertainment,Movies — pauljlane @ 3:20 pm
Mmm, chicken ...

Mmm, chicken ...

Everyone has questions that linger inside their heads for years, perhaps ultimately unanswerable queries that haunt them on a regular basis.

What’s the meaning of life?

Why are we here?

What movie ties in most closely to each respective part of a chicken?

Fear not, poultry purveyors. Your answers to that third question are here at last. Here, in no particular order, are the films that relate best to each respective part of a chicken.

HEAD: “Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace”. The most-hated of all six films in the “Star Wars” franchise, “The Phantom Menace” as part one (actually released fourth in the series) is just like a chicken’s cranium. The bird can’t exist without it, but once it’s served its purpose it’s quickly disposed of with little mind payed to it afterward. “The Phantom Menace” offered valuable background information, but it’s the least watchable of the films and probably won’t be viewed a second time except by the most die-hard of fans.

BREAST: “The Shawshank Redemption”. Not the first movie/piece of chicken you’ll pull, but it always satisfies, remains vastly underrated and once you consume it, you remember why it remains in your rotation. It’s meaty and juicy, to boot. Not a No. 1 pick for most people, but nearly always in the Top Three.

LEG: The Joker. I’ll defer to a movie character here as opposed to a film, drawing from Jack Nicholson’s Joker in “Batman” and Heath Ledger’s Joker from “The Dark Knight.” The Joker is the first pick for every Batman fan in terms of a villain they want to see, just like all the legs vanish from the bucket before anyone even thinks about the other pieces. There are fans of both the light (Nicholson) and dark (Ledger) offerings, which offer greatly contrasting options yet both have something that anyone can enjoy. All in all, probably the tastiest offerings in their respective mediums.

WING: “Animal House”. Great at parties, full of spice and zest, easy to handle, not too much to it so as to overwhelm the consumer, leaves everyone smiling.

NUGGET: “The Wizard of Oz”. Just like flying monkeys and talking scarecrows, only the strangest, most creative mind could have come up with the chicken nugget. No one really knows what it’s made of, no one knows why it exists and no one knows why they love it – but love it they do. The McNugget, by comparison, would be Michael Jackson’s “The Wiz.”

BUTT: “Speed Racer”. What happens with a chicken’s butt? Nobody really knows, just like nobody really knew that “Speed Racer” came into theaters last summer.

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